8 Reasons Why a Baby Refuses to Be Held by Their Mother and How to Handle It
Have you ever felt worried when your baby suddenly refuses to be held? When a baby refuses to be held by their mother, it can be confusing and concerning, especially when a usually calm and content baby suddenly becomes fussy when being held.
If this situation continues for too long, not only will it make the mother feel stressed and anxious, but it can also affect the emotional bond between mother and baby. In addition, a baby who constantly refuses to be held may be feeling uncomfortable, which can impact their comfort and happiness. Without knowing the cause, it will be difficult to find an effective solution, and this can make things worse.
This phenomenon is actually normal and can happen at various baby ages. However, understanding the reasons why a baby refuses to be held will help mothers respond more appropriately and worry less. By knowing the causes and solutions, you can help your baby feel more comfortable and bring back those warm, loving moments of holding your little one.
Common Reasons Why a Baby Refuses to Be Held by Their Mother and How to Handle It
Most babies love warm physical contact with their parents. However, there are times when your little one feels uncomfortable and cranky when being held. Some common reasons why your baby refuses to be held include:
1. The Baby Is Tired or Sleepy
A tired or sleepy baby often shows signs such as yawning, rubbing their eyes, or becoming fussy. In this condition, the baby may refuse to be held because they just want to sleep. Let your baby rest or nap for a while before trying to hold them again. Try a calm and comfortable holding position, and avoid activities that are too stimulating.
2. The Baby Feels Uncomfortable
A baby who feels uncomfortable may squirm, cry, or arch their back when being held. The discomfort can be caused by various things, such as a wet diaper, tight clothing, stomach pain, or an uncomfortable temperature. The solution is to check the diaper, clothing, or the baby’s body temperature. Make sure your baby is not too hot or too cold. Choose soft and breathable clothing, and keep the environment at a comfortable temperature.
3. The Baby Is Sick or Not Feeling Well
A sick or unwell baby may show symptoms such as fever, runny nose, cough, bloating, or other signs. In this condition, the baby may refuse to be held because they feel uncomfortable. Provide proper care based on their condition, such as fever reducers or safe cough medicine for babies. Consult a doctor if the symptoms persist.
4. The Baby Is Overstimulated
An overstimulated baby may become fussy, easily startled, or avoid eye contact. A noisy or overly bright environment can make a baby feel disturbed and refuse to be held. Therefore, create a calm atmosphere by reducing noise, dimming bright lights, limiting overly active interactions, and giving your baby some quiet time to calm down.
5. The Baby Is Experiencing Separation Anxiety
Separation anxiety is a condition where a baby feels anxious when separated from their parents, especially their mother. Common signs include crying hysterically when left alone, clinging to the parent, and having difficulty being comforted by others. The solution is to practice short separations gradually, give them familiar objects for comfort, and show lots of affection and attention when together. Maintaining a consistent routine can also help reduce your baby’s anxiety.
6. The Baby Is Experiencing a Developmental Leap
Developmental leaps are phases where babies go through sudden growth spurts that can affect their sleep, appetite, or behavior. During this time, babies may become fussier and refuse to be held. The best way to handle this is with patience and extra support. Understand that this is a normal developmental phase and is only temporary.
7. The Mother Uses Perfume or Strongly Scented Products
Babies who are sensitive to certain smells may turn their face away or sneeze when being held. Perfumes or personal care products with strong fragrances can make them uncomfortable. Therefore, avoid using perfumes or heavily scented products before holding your baby. Choose fragrance-free or mild products to keep your baby feeling comfortable.
8. The Mother Feels Anxious or Stressed
Babies can sense their mother’s emotions, including anxiety or stress. When a mother feels anxious or under pressure, her baby may become fussy or difficult to soothe when being held. Try managing your stress and anxiety through meditation, yoga, or talking to someone you trust. Staying calm is essential because babies can feel their mother’s emotions.
Additional Tips to Help When a Baby Refuses to Be Held by Their Mother
- Try Different Holding Positions: Explore various holding positions such as cradle hold, football hold, or upright hold to see which one your baby prefers.
- Use a Baby Carrier: Baby carriers can help provide comfort and a sense of security for your baby. They also allow mothers to keep their hands free while bonding closely with their little one.
- Engage Your Baby: Talk, sing, dance, or play with your baby while holding them to help them feel more relaxed and connected.
- Involve the Father or Other Caregivers: Let someone else hold the baby while you rest. This also helps your baby get used to other caregivers besides the mother.
Read also: No Need to Panic, Here Are 8 Ways to Overcome Nipple Confusion in Babies
If your baby shows danger signs such as high fever, persistent vomiting, severe diarrhea, difficulty breathing, lethargy, or refusal to feed, consult a doctor immediately. It’s important to stay alert and seek medical help if you feel worried.
When a baby refuses to be held by their mother, it can be challenging, but by understanding the causes and trying the right solutions, you can help your baby feel more comfortable. Remember that this is a normal and manageable phase. Always show love and attention to your little one, and don’t hesitate to ask for help if needed. A baby who feels safe and comfortable will grow into a healthy and happy child.
Stay updated with the latest information and valuable tips about breastfeeding and parenting on the Hegen Indonesia blog. You can also find various baby essentials such as multi-purpose PPSU baby bottles, breastmilk storage, straw cups, manual and electric breast pumps, and other breastfeeding accessories available at Hegen Indonesia’s website. Grab yours now!
References:
Mary Sauer. BabyCenter.com. Is it normal that your baby doesn’t like being held or cuddled? https://www.babycenter.com/baby/crying-colic/is-it-normal-that-my-baby-doesnt-like-being-held-or-cuddled_13460?_x_tr_hist=true
Pragmatic Parenting. "How to Calm a Fussy Baby: Why Babies Cry & How to Sooth Them". https://www.thepragmaticparent.com/how-to-calm-a-fussy-baby/
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